Tired of the Same Habits? Let’s Get Extreme About It
With a lot of things I do for a living, I will say that I’m equally terrible at other things. I do feel I try to get too much in a day, with working out, cleaning, having a social life along side providing you with motivational content.
When you try to get better at something you don’t want to do it can be a real challenge.
There’s a lot in this world that forces you to not change. Your biology of your brain doesn’t like change. Same with how your body doesn’t like change. That means the entire world doesn’t like change.
When I can’t do something as well as I would like which takes a lot of time. I tell myself that I can do better to get me to the level I want to be at.
Like for an example I would list more than 7 things to do a day but really it comes down to 3 things. This is what lead to my creation of the One Step Journal in that we really only have the energy to do what’s most important in a day because it’s such a finite amount.
Once you start making your day more manageable about what you can do you’ll feel better about yourself.
But I only felt better for a few days. My list would slowly grow in having things that I should be doing. After a week I would get frustrated.
When I try to go over my to do list, It happens.
Instead of a Degree of Change, Why Not Go a Full 180?
I read this article called ‘Over-compensate to compensate‘ by Derek Sivers, who sells indie music. In the post, Derek says that most of us fail to change because we don’t do enough.
Derek uses a metaphor of bricks on a seesaw. When we want change we put all the bricks on one side of the see saw.
When you make a small change such as a smaller to do list, one brick moves. It may be a step int he right direction but it’s not enough to balanced it out.
The problem with this is a small improvement isn’t going to change your life.
Habits are hard to remove because they are the path of least resistance. That’s what our brain prefers.
Our brains what is simple because we don’t like to think. That’s because it takes energy and makes us feel tired. So we follow a habit like how a train follows a track.
When you see a train changing tracks, it’s not easy or fast. The train usually has to slow down or even stop. This is the same way we deal with habits.
To have it the way to be efficient is we need to be extreme about it as Derek says. We need to place all the bricks on the other side, not just one at a time
When you do this you’re going to feel like you’re overcompensating and in the other direction.
But you’re not. You’re actually just evening out.
Even when you go extreme the other way, your natural resistance will even it out. thus the seesaw will be balanced.
So I was trying to even out the seesaw by only one brick at a time but eventually just moving back to how I was.
I wasn’t changing via the long term.
Overcompensating to Improve
After reading Derek’s material, I realized by doing the things I was terribly was just my brain being natural in how it works and now when I know how and figure out how to put it in the way I want it to be.
So here’s some examples of going extreme would look like.
1. Super clean the whole house to a spotless level
It’s tough because I always view my house clean but whenever my mom sees it she disagrees. Just because you make the bed, doesn’t mean it’s done ‘nicely’ to her.
My extreme action was to go above and beyond what I naturally do when I clean.
2. Keep contact with friends and family
When you’re in school or live in your parents big neighborhood you’re surround with people who are your friends and family. When you get older and move out you pretty much live a whole new life instead and it’s difficult to regain what you once had.
My extreme action was to call a friend or family member a day.
3. Say no to more projects
I get excited about starting something new. It’s a strong passion but sometimes the idea of it gets the best of me.
My extreme action would be to only finish a project before starting a new one.
4. Write in a routine
I would say I’ve fallen out of a routine and even last week I had to take care of other personal matters when I should be writing my next podcast episode.
My extreme action is to write daily. Even if I don’t write a whole lot I need to make some kind of progress.
5. Learning to deal with anxiety
When you’re doing a lot and new things that will put you out of your comfort zone, you’re going to deal with some level of anxiety. I will say I deal with it more on average. It’s what happens when I try to do a lot.
My extreme action was to figure what to do first and then just dump everything tomorrow. Sometimes I needed to just not do anything at all as resting isn’t a unproductively as one would think.
Now when I want to get better at all these things I need to know it’s impossible to them all at once. It’s just too much willpower and overall not healthy for you. Especially when our bodies don’t work that way.
So instead, let’s go about one a month and see how we gain from it.
Researches say habits take about a month or two to form. I wouldn’t advise going two months because we’re looking for balance and not insanity.
Bear in mind this isn’t a to do list. This is still just an on going mentality to have. If I finish one thing, then I’ll move on to the next. It’s just great not having the pressure to have it all done today.
Now you probably want to get better at something. It’s wonderful to have the actions to improve. Be a better person, for a better you and everyone you’re with.
This extreme mindset isn’t for everyone. If it doesn’t work, at least you tried and learned about yourself. Nobody frowned upon a good effort.
So join in on something you think our terrible and see an extreme way of improvement can help you. Remember to work with your brain, not against it.
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